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My husband, Rob, has been coaching our daughter’s soccer team since she was in the pee-wee league. She’s now part of a U14 2012 club team (for those not familiar with youth sports lingo — that’s age 14, born in 2012).
I’ve seen it all — from those early co-ed “scrum ball” days, where every kid chased the ball at once, to today’s fierce, highly skilled competition that can look like figure skating on grass. I’ve sat through 90-degree scorchers and 30-degree near-snow games. Most recently, I sat in a van with four teenage girls waiting out a thunderstorm. Trust me — you should be very glad this email doesn’t come with a scratch-and-sniff option.
What I had never seen in ten years as a coach’s wife and goalkeeper’s mom was a game ending early.
Until a few weeks ago.
Rob, our daughter Katie, my mom, and I drove 1.25 hours to one of the first games of the season. We knew it would be a tough matchup — it always is against this team. They’re big and strong, while our team tends to be on the quicker, smaller side.
From the opening minutes, the game turned physical. U14 girls can be feisty, but this was on another level — pushing in the back, grabbing jerseys. Right in front of me, one of their players lifted one of ours around the waist and spun her around. I was sitting next to that player’s dad, who had to stop himself from going full papa bear mode. A yellow card was issued.
Minutes later, Katie was fouled inside the goalie box. She takes her job seriously, so this wasn’t entirely unusual — but it added to the tension.
Then came the play that changed everything. One of our fastest players broke toward the goal, only to be shoved hard from behind, flipping upside down. It happened right in front of Rob. He’s coached that player for nearly her entire soccer career — and he immediately knew she could have been seriously hurt.
At that moment, he walked straight to the referees and opposing coach and said calmly, “If there’s one more dirty play, the game’s over.”
The other coach brushed it off. Play resumed. And within a minute — another dangerous foul.
Fifteen minutes into the game, Rob called the players to the sideline and told them to pack up. The game was over. He was not going to risk his players’ safety any further.
Everyone — players, coaches, parents — was stunned. I was stunned. In ten years, I’d never seen a youth game end early for anything other than weather.
And yet, I could not have been prouder of my husband.
In the short term, he protected his players. In the long term, he modeled what it means for an adult to truly have your back.
After I got past my shock and anger, I laughed under my breath. Just a week earlier, I’d been interviewed by fellow speaker and coach Todd Bertsch on The BOLT Podcast. When he asked me who I most admired as a leader, I said: my husband. (You can hear that part during the Lightening Round, starting at minute 51.)
I told Todd that Rob is an “all-in” kind of guy — at work, as a coach, as a parent. There’s no halfway with him. That kind of conviction is rare today, in a world where it can feel easier to quietly quit or walk away.
I didn’t know, when I said that, that I’d have such a powerful real-life example to share just weeks later — right around our 23rd wedding anniversary, no less.
The game was filmed, and I’m fairly sure it’s the most-watched U14 game in Ohio this year. The referees asked to rewatch the footage (they even apologized for a few fouls they missed). The league reviewed it, too.
Ultimately, the game was wiped from the record — not a forfeit, not a win or loss — just erased. Like it never happened.
That the players remember the day they stood tall against a harsh opponent. That they know what it feels like to have adults protect and advocate for them. That they carry that lesson off the field — into friendships, classrooms, and future workplaces.
A Few Reflections for You
This moment shook me — and it reminded me how powerful it is when someone simply decides to do the right thing, even when it’s uncomfortable.
We each hold that power. The question is: will we use it?
Moments like this remind me why I do this work — creating spaces where courage, connection, and compassion thrive. That's exactly what we experienced at Let Her Out LIVE in New Orleans. It was pure magic — the kind that reminds us what’s possible when women gather with intention. Take a peek at the highlight reel below!
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